Last blog, I mentioned that I felt like my Psychology Professors thought that it was kinda dumb idea to drop my two major subjects in order to dodge department probation if I would just take the C and a passing grade of D. Well I don’t know if you can say that people in your same batch in terms of Psychology majors wanted you to get delayed or they just knew how scary it was if you received probation. I mean I knew how hard it was for my fellow blockmate that also majored in Psychology that she has to keep pushing herself to get one grade higher than the bare minimum quota for the department. I was thinking I already got sick trying to keep up with the bare minimum quota, what more if I have to strive harder to get the above minimum quota? So maybe I was thinking I needed to rest. I know financially it was a stupid move (thus where I think the dumb move came from) and maybe you are not believing in yourself that you could make it. Then the semester after I got sick, I ended up getting delayed so I wouldn’t get confused with my major subjects from both of my courses. I consulted with my parents that maybe delaying for 1 year is probably the best option. I didn’t stop attending school, it’s just that I delayed on choosing my major subject in commerce as I sort out my pending major subjects in Psychology, then get the remaining general business courses for my Commerce so by the time I get to choose my major in Commerce, I just need to focus on the major subjects of Comemrce. As much as it hurts, but they weren’t mad about it because health is more important right?
So came the difficult part for probably 2-3 years. Every family reunion when relatives ask you when you are graduating… you either go the route of telling the truth you have to study for 6 years (because a 5-year course is already difficult to explain), or you would say other random stuff to confuse them. Then you have your high school batchmates and college peers who are already posting their togas as they are already “Gradwaiting”
A difficult 2.5 years indeed. You may be wondering where the blessing is then?
Well here is the fun part. I felt like I was living the best time of my life as a college student. Maybe some people would think of partying or stuff, but no I wasn’t referring to that. I refer to the things I never imagined I would do, but did. I thought I could replicate my performance in 4th year high school towards college… I not only replicated it, but I did better.
Imagine if I pushed my academics to get under probation just to graduate on time? I don’t know for some reason I might feel like a failure or just an ordinary student who would settle for a low position in the organization or nothing at all and be part of the committee. I know for some people they would have joked that you just delayed so you get to experience being an organization president? I mean in the first place why would you plan such an absurd idea right?
What I am trying to say is that if I have the natural path of being a college student whether choosing a 4 or 5-year track, I would admit that the competition is tough - very tough. Nobody is going to vote for someone who is a pure-blooded Chinese with a Filipino Citizenship going against a Filipino-dominated community.
Fresh off being a club leader in high school, you know that you have to start from the bottom hoping that you’ll end up on top by the time you are in your graduating year. Mostly the jumping point to be on the very top is being a class representative (or class rep as what we call). However because it’s college, I think my mom didn’t want me to vie for that position because you don’t know who you are dealing with in a new environment, new culture and new people. My Scholastican alumna neighbor also discouraged me to become one too, so I knew I wouldn’t get that position - which eventually came true as the junior or senior student organization officers said they would discourage students studying double degree majors to become class representatives so our representative was our political science blockmate.
Meanwhile when it comes to organizations and societies, there’s the mandatory membership that is tied up to your academic course and the interest organization. You can also join other academic organizations even if it’s not related to your course. Typical first year trying to navigate through, aside from paying for the mandatory membership fee for my Double-Majors Society, my mom also gave me money so I can join whichever I wanted. I eventually joined Peer Facilitator’s Club (the club where the one who marshaled us during the first year orientation. Hey, I have to go to something familiar.)
Fast forward to the end of my freshmen year with us experiencing instability of changing leadership positions every semester, we are bracing for another change in leadership position due to our Literature major class representative needing to take a break from studying. Being the oldest in our block, she was like our big sister to us. I remember it was at McDonald’s Vito Cruz we were discussing this as the term ends and on to summer break. I guess from her point of view, she knew our block was screwed because somebody had to step up, and with the constraints she mentioned, she would be begging anyone from Literature and Political Science students (sans the one who got removed by the council) to take over. At that time we were like why don’t we just choose our Political Science blockmate to lead us? She has leadership in her veins only for the then class rep to say she is not on board with the idea of her leading the block. Imagine our then class rep eliminating us double majors, scholars, people who are extremely busy outside school, and you cannot ask our foreigner nun blockmate to lead us. I would say it was indeed a disaster. I mean it was not our then class rep’s control on who we choose to replace her. Our mind knows who to choose already even if it’s against her will until this said blockmate of ours sent us a group message stating that her parents didn’t allow her to lead the block due to underperforming in her academics.
We were like oh well let’s just cross the bridge when we get there until a new academic class starts and in that school gymnasium, I remembered when our PE professor asked us who is our class representative that my blockmate mentioned my name. I accepted it because if I didn't, who the heck would take over? I would admit I partially wanted that class representative position so bad because through observation and the crap I’ve been through because of my then class representative that very first year almost made me fail the NSTP class by losing my parent’s signed permit (that I ended up having to bring my mom to school and explained the situation to the professor. My mom didn’t even say a word and just stood 2 feet away. After the professor was convinced, I submitted the written explanation with my mom’s signature to her) and also thought I was responsible for losing my own convocation card (it’s like a point card every time we attend a major activity. So I have to buy another one and would have to convince any authorized signatory that I did attend their event or I have to make-up for the missed event) only to find out when there was a change in leadership position on our block that my convocation card has been with them all along as we received our exam permits and I ended up having two convocation cards in possession. Well I guess the blessing there was we had an irregular classmate in one of our subjects who did not complete the number of points needed so I gave her the newer one.
The class rep position? I held it until all my blockmates and core coursemates graduated except for that one semester where I let my blockmate take over (it was a blessing in disguise too as I did not know I’ll end up getting hospitalized that semester that led to us discussing this). By the time they all finished, I joined my lower batch double major blockmates as we are all on the same track by then and of course I really like my class representative then. I just made sure I do my part to make her life easier as our class representative because I know being a class representative for double degree majors with varying specialty is not an easy feat. It’s like catering to a few babies but all with different and demanding needs unlike catering to many babies but they exactly have the same needs.
As for the extra-curricular activities? Now this gets interesting. So by the time I entered Sophomore year, I actually had an organizational position in my academic organization. It was short-lived because I didn’t expect that I would also be a class representative so I resigned to the organization position as my mom felt being a class representative is more valuable than being a head of souvenirs or something (See I forgot my position. Lol!). During that same year on recruitment week, I learned that Peer Facilitator’s Club was already dissolved. So I was like oh I’ll just join my academic organization and that’s it. Then during recruitment week, a male classmate of mine (yes there are male students in St. Scho then but as long as it’s music or Fine Arts) would suddenly ask me to come along only to find out the officers of that organization would like to recruit me to become a member. I think I was given money to join whichever I wanted. I was like okay I’ll join Environment Society (or what we call Envisoc). Little did I know that saying yes in joining would spearhead my extra-curricular life for the rest of my stay in college and eventually become my jumpstart in the corporate world.
As the years go by and get immersed in various organizations, you already know the pattern on how things work. At this point you already start dreaming and hoping if one day you’ll become an organization president. Maybe in my heart I felt not getting a presidential position would be a failure to me especially because I felt I ended up on a positive note as I graduated from high school. I was a club president and also a class president when I graduated in high school. However things are getting uncertain, then you wonder if you’ll make it. If I look at my academic affiliation, I don’t think I’ll make it. I knew my blockmate who has the same liberal arts major as me would be the one most likely to take over when one of us has to become a president of that organization. She’s been there since the first year while I… I end up resigning to a small position (what more if it’s a bigger one right?) and for some reason I don’t know why I wasn’t able to attend that general assembly when they already started voting for a new set of officers for the next year. I remember my blockmates told me that I should attend next time so I’ll have a position in that org. It was an unfortunate circumstance that that was the last time our organization would exist as we didn’t meet the quota required by the student affairs office.
Meanwhile in Envisoc, I also learned that the organization was under probation when I joined, but there were movements there and I joined and helped with some of those activities. For some reason I remembered that I think I almost wanted to quit and didn’t want to attend their acquaintance party (because it’s at night), but I’m glad I didn’t. To be honest I never thought of leading an interest organization because my mind knew who would become a president there one day. However, the day of the elections of Envisoc, they elected me as a treasurer. Not only that, the one who I thought would lead the org one day mentioned she cannot be elected because she will focus on one day leading her academic affiliation.
During my time in Envisoc as a newly minted officer, it came at a time where there is a surge of mass communication students joining the organization. I think it was probably the set of officers there were able to recruit members from their own course. That year we can probably say a year we can forget since we severely underperformed as an organization. Maybe you can just say some people knew in their heart that they are not really fit to run the organization even if they have enough experience, but they accepted it. It also means some people are meant to perform better as a supporter than as a leader - and that’s okay. Then the then president that time chose to demote herself back to the position she knew she thrived so well - in fact that position garnered her as one of the best non-presidents in the organization. Then she promoted me as an Internal Vice President (IVP) with someone from the Mass Communications department taking over as the president.
That year, I could say we are a bit thriving because of our leader. During that time, it was the fourth year of my school year and my 3rd time as a member of the organization. However, things are getting tricky, our then president and I are theoretically going to graduate at the same time if things run smoothly on my end academically with both of us having one academic year left. Knowing that I am one position away from being the president, I felt like I need to get that if indeed the rumors of her running for the student council position is true. I felt like how am I supposed to get that when I don’t have anybody to support me while there was a threat that an officer from the student council would actually gun for that presidential position? I mean my blockmate friends can only console and give advice but they cannot vote for me since they are not members of the organization. I felt like a demotion is going to be a slap on my face. Thankfully, my guidance counselor put me in my right senses. When I sought for her consultation about my issues she said I just got hospitalized, can my body handle the stress if I’m an organization president? Then she asked what are your actual plans if you are the president? This alone made me realize that I didn’t have any concrete plans. I just wanted to get that position and was thinking it would be whatever. In the end my counselor told me, even if our organization was dominated by mass communication students, if they see my value in the organization, they will vote for me no matter what my course is.
What the counselor said was indeed true. I got demoted back to Treasurer - a position where no one dared to take because of money and trust involved. It was a set-back, but not a major one because still getting the top 5 position despite going against odds was a miracle. It indeed helped that I was the org treasurer before, a business student and also of Chinese descent since they usually associate Chinese with being good in math anyways. The one who wanted to lead the organization indeed became our president.
As the new school year starts, I think being demoted was the best decision that happened in my academic life. Our president, who used to be part of the student council, was indeed a blessing for me and the organization. While she can trust me with money matters that I am not cheating on them even if she was joking that she kept on signing financial reports without understanding a single thing that I might be selling her, she helped me take advantage of the privilege the organization could do in terms of finances. Who knew we could get money from the student affair’s budget aside from the membership fees we get every recruitment week? (Of course for as long as it met with the school’s criteria like honorarium etc). Not only that, she together with our moderator helped give me structure.
During the same school year, I got to know my new set of classmates in my Commerce major. There were six of us and those five of them were somehow somewhere together for a certain period of time. As I converse with one of the higher level students of my commerce major regarding the organization, perhaps I was aimlessly wondering what would be my next move in terms of extra curricular? I knew that they were only six of us who can vie for the president position of the said organization. I somewhat had an experience when it comes to leading a computer-related organization in my high school years. It wasn’t perfect - in fact it was bad, but I felt if I would be given another chance, I would be more prepared on what’s to come. Then as the senior officers of my academic commerce organization which we call Business and Information Technology Society or BITS set up a meeting with us, there were some vacant positions that were handed down to us. I got the position of Assistant Outreach Liaison Officer (or Assistant OLO). From the position itself I knew it has something to do with finding places where we could do some outreach activities.
At the start of the first few months, it seems like our then president of Envisoc once mentioned that if I stayed in the organization for a long time, maybe it’s time for me to take the mantle from her once she graduates as I still have one more year left. Then there was the possibility that you can also take the president position of BITS since I felt like I would be the one that the moderators and my commerce major professors wanted to take over. I knew that there was a rule that if you are going to gun for the presidency of any position in the school, you can only take one while giving up on the other with no cushion of getting a lower position if everything fails. If I am going to use my brain, it would really make sense for my career if I gun for the academic organization position versus an interest position as it would show on your resume that you lead an academic organization. However, I realize that I would be going against my classmates who have been together through thick or thin prior to choosing their major subject in commerce. Being two years older than most of them, it would mean I have more experience than them when it comes to managing academics and extracurriculars. Then you factor into how much these people would actually help you if you were indeed chosen to become the president. On the other hand, gunning for the Envisoc presidential position is no cakewalk. I already knew who would be the “threat” to take over the position. She was new in the organization (as far as my knowledge is concerned), but she have enough votes to pull it off due to having most members coming from their course if it would come between the two of us. So many questions and decisions to make.
As the year is about to end, various organizations and also the student council held their respective elections. This was the time I had to make a decision. Either give up your dreams of leading in any school organization while setting for a guaranteed spot at your academic organization to prop up your resume or put all your eggs in one basket to the one your heart was yearning for and fight. Like I said the unspoken school rule was if you are running for any student council position or any presidential position in the school organization, you cannot run for any other position including guaranteed cushions of lower positions. In the end, through the support of my original blockmates and my commerce blockmates, I decided to choose my heart over what would look good in my resume - my career. I decided to run for Environment Society President and gave up the idea of running (or going against) any one of my commerce blockmates in BITS. My original blockmates (who are in their graduating year) and my current commerce blockmates supported me (perhaps they were relieved that I wasn’t a threat to them anymore as one of them said that some of my classmates were scared that I was going to take over that presidential position - which would be weird that an ‘outsider’ will take over the leadership position). True enough the one who I thought would go against me was the one who indeed was the one going to run against me as the president of Envisoc.
During the campaign period, I just knew I had to hope and pray that God would give me a chance. During that time it happened that my Corporate Communications professor required us to create a speech as one of his assignments. It was perfect timing as I could use that speech as part of my assignment and also use it as part of our campaign speech. I just knew I had to double or probably triple the effort. It was nice that my original blockmates were very supportive. They knew how it feels like when you are going to go against someone who opponents felt were outsiders - and I knew their story too. It was a hard-fought battle and they eventually got all the positions they wanted in their academic organization. So what they did allowed me to realize that there is hope - hope that anything is possible.
The day has come when we have to say our speech during that General Assembly. It was nerve-wracking, but seeing who was running for which position, I knew I had to create an alliance - like they said when minorities join together, you can put up a fight against the majority. I wouldn’t mind if they will help me lead as I somehow know them already. So we all end up mentioning each other’s names during our respective speeches to show solidarity for the minority group to vote for us together. After my speech, what was surprising was that my opponent somewhat conceded that the members should vote for me instead. As much as it would have relieved you, it’s still based on a majority vote. People would still feel she deserves it more than me or it could mean to lower my guard on seeing her as a threat. Anything could happen on that one fateful electoral vote.
In the end, everything fell into my favor - I won the elections and my two vice presidents that I wanted to be on my team also won. Although they said when running for a presidential position, there should be no cushions allowed, the one I beat would eventually be the one who would replace me as a Treasurer of the organization. I’m glad she was able to secure a slot in our organization by running for two different positions. I would honestly say it would be very unfortunate for either one of us whoever lost the election because I can say both of us are capable officers. Same to those people who end up losing major elections.
I guess you would say that sometimes you don’t know where life leads you. Looking back, I realized that extending your stay in school for one year was what I needed in order to experience and enjoy my college life to the fullest. God knows that I wouldn't be a lazy student who would fail her classes, so He did something else that is out of my control and it’s something that my parents wouldn’t be mad at me for. Yes it was sometimes difficult to explain during those 2.5 years why I still cannot finish. I’m like a broken record saying the same things over and over again to those people asking when I will graduate. It doesn’t even help when your high school friends have already finished their degrees and are trying to live their life outside the four walls of the school while you are still stuck in books and PowerPoint slides.
I remember when my mom gave me that paper saying make the most of my last school year. I can say I did. Aside from being the organization president, I could say that I did well - well enough that I was able to sustain on being a top 10 president among all the student leaders. Then I got to be a Dean’s lister, got interviewed for a school newspaper, and perhaps a lot of things that I would really cherish.
I am happy that I made the right decision to choose to put all eggs in one basket and fight by gunning the presidential position that your heart leads you. It may not have been nice on the resume that you are a leader of an interest organization (and not an academic position), buy hey I got to be the top 10 president for that year. It was not bad to place it in your resume too.
The best part? I get to know the awesome people I am working with at the only company that I know ever since graduation. Imagine when the only time my company became aggressive in school job fairs outside of that green school was during my 6th year in school. Imagine if I didn’t get delayed, I wouldn’t probably know that such a company exist. I wouldn’t know that there are people inside that company that I would eventually create a strong rapport with.
So I guess I could say irrationality indeed turned into a blessing.
