Choose Your Group Mate When Nothing's at Stake: Talent or Effort?

How do you choose group members in graduate school when almost everyone knows that nothing is really at stake except to get a pass? Rarely do professors fail a student in graduate school, unless the student is performing very, very poorly.

During college or even high school, usually people tend to be lucky if they end up with a group mate who is not only intelligent enough, but is also running for honors or even achieving a Latin honor when they were about to graduate college. This would mean that not only you're going to have a talented group mate, but they're also the ones who will exert most effort even if it would come to a point that he/she will be the one doing everything. Additionally, this would also mean that the group mates around this person could actually afford to lax in terms of their contribution to a particular project or activity. However on the other end of the spectrum, there are students who are average or sometimes below average intelligence wise, but their effort sometimes exceed to that of the honor students.

Then comes the graduate school - where nothing is really at stake in terms of your personal, educational or even your professional career. It was not like in high school or in college wherein every grade or performance mattered. Here a graduate diploma is more of an icing on the cake. So when it comes to groupings - whether choose your own or count off, one might be hearing lots of friction among group members. Of course, since you would be label as professionals, it would be expected of you to confront things professionally and not just argue with each other like kids. Also, that would mean that professors may not care whether your group would contribute their part or not. In all the subjects I took in the MBA program, I only had three professors who actually do care about ranking group members.

Unlike college and in high school, making excuses is possible in graduate school because of work. One can constantly say that they are busy at work, they are in weird shifts etc. You cannot make those kinds of excuses during college - unless of course you are really working as part time (then, that would be a different story). Also, you cannot cite extracurricular activities as an excuse not to contribute your part (it was your choice to join there in the first place). In graduate school, you are all working and being a student is a part time.

So how do you choose your group members now knowing that some of your classmates can have a leeway of using work as an excuse not to contribute much? You may have group members who are intelligent, but does not want to make significant contribution. On the other hand, you may also have group members who are deemed incapable of contributing significantly, yet you see their initiative to find ways in contributing to the task.

For those who are aware that they are incapable to make significant contribution in terms of knowledge, they might depend on classmates who are very good at talking but does not provide the translated output. As for other students who are on the "always busy" mode, they might lean towards classmates who are very industrious when it comes to providing meaningful output, in that way they can be afforded to buy some time in finishing their work at the same time allow them to somehow provide minimal input.

Generally, I think students would choose someone who could provide the best effort in any task even if nothing was really at stake. In an environment wherein everybody is busy doing something whether it is about work, personal matters or even family, one would really need to depend on someone who is willing to put an effort rather than those who are intelligent enough yet fail to provide a meaningful output in a group.

"You'll Never, Ever Experience Doing a Book Report in Your MBA"

During the last day of our class in Investment Analysis (one of my elective class as part of completion for my specialization), we had our final exam in a multiple choice format. During this time, my core friends in MBA and my former classmates from previous subjects are done with their Strategic Management class and were participating in their Integrative Action Research workshop.

During the exam, I happened to stumble upon two questions that are Strategic Management-related concepts such as Porter's Five forces. I just took a picture of those questionnaire and did not post it on social media until all exams are done since I was planning to make a joke that we're also taking up Strategic Management - albeit during the final exam.

After the examination, I indeed post the said questionnaires with the caption "Sinong may sabi na kayo lang may Strama [Strategic Management], kami din noh? Sa final exam nga lang." Some of my former classmates took a laugh on it based on their reactions of the said post. Meanwhile one of my former classmates somewhat took a shot on it commenting on my post that nothing beats doing a Strategic Management paper. It was utterly true that nothing beats doing a Strategic Management paper as the paper was really hard to do, but I think all of those who reacted on it knew that it was just humor. Since I took up an additional electives in pursuit of my specialization in Financial Management, I replied to his comment as "True, but you'll never, ever experience doing a book report in your MBA." One of my classmates who also pursued specialization saw my comment and he was like, I did a great job replying at that post because it made sense.

While the quote seemed to be that childish as that graduate students should not supposed to be doing book reports as it was supposed to be done during elementary or at most college days. However, the book report is not just a book. We're talking about The Black Swan by Nassim Taleb and The Return of Depression Economics by Paul Krugman. Those are quite sophisticated books - way beyond what we normally read such as novels or even articles.

Those that were ahead of us may have the bragging rights in terms of experiencing something that would make other people like us somewhat jealous of their accomplishments. However, the desire to experience everything first might fail them to miss on other things that were also worth experiencing. One could post that he/she could finish the program at a faster pace, while people who chose specialization like me can brag that at least we get to have an extension of our degrees like MBA-FIN or MBA-MKT by the time we graduate. They may never get that chance again as they chose to do things at a faster pace even if one thinks it's such an unnecessary thing to do.

Dear Friend

Dear MBA friend,

Once you came back from your trip in some part of North Asia, you would probably know that I would not make past the endorsement for our Integrative Action Research (IAR) defense on my own volition. I had made up my mind for the past few weeks, but couldn't tell it in our group chat that I plan to defer as I know that you would be quite upset about this as you all wanted our group to graduate together this coming June.

In our group, perhaps I was the second one who chose to be left behind as you all chose the typical route in the MBA program. I know that I would be left behind until three of our friends in MBA decided not to enroll thesis writing and you were the only one left going through the IAR writing alone. It was a determined way of you to do that and I admire you for it. How could I wish that I could be as determined as you despite having a lot on your plate whether it's about school, work, family, etc. Heck, you actually passed the writing and defense in one shot despite all the setbacks you've encountered during the defense.

I know that you weren't able to march with some of the students who also passed the defense during that term for personal reasons, which actually kept our hopes alive that we could march in June together. While you are waiting for us, I can join our other friends in the thesis writing as I was done with my last formal class.

But then, two weeks ago, I started to reflect back as I was doing my Chapter 2 for IAR writing around 3 to 4 in the morning thinking if pushing it through was actually worth it in exchange for my health. I am aware that I'm not the most immune of all. Lessons during my college days taught me how to actually take care of my body and not to abuse it anymore. I would not want to repeat major subjects (or in this case thesis writing or defense) just because I got hospitalized two weeks before the semester ended. I guess knowing that one of our friends in the group firmly decided to stay behind to further hone her paper made it an easier decision thinking that I can join her as we all cheer the rest of you to your June graduation.

While making this one last push would mean that I could finally get free from the school duties and finally becoming an MBA-FIN, at the same time being able to march with all of you so that we could embark on our far away travels should there be one. However, I think this is the battle that I chose not to fight thoroughly or desperately with. I know some of our classmates were quite startled that I was quite relaxed as the endorsement date approaches, but lots of factors came into play like nothing is really at stake for me in terms of planning for a career change or a change in life role. Perhaps my mentor giving me very minor feedback concerns me as I was not used to those kinds of feedback which might haunt me during IAR defense. The times that our group have gone through would be enough for me to cherish even if it would mean that I would be marching with our other friend at least one term behind.

What's more important is that we'll both make it at the end of our MBA journey- albeit not on the same pace. Again, congratulations as you're going to march this June!

If MBA Journey Would be Treated Like Travelling to Places...

As I was about to attend my last formal class for my MBA next week (it was supposed to start last week but suspension and professor's errands prevented it from happening), it allowed me to see how different people approach their MBA journey. Most of the people would think that taking up graduate school is a key to success or promotion in the corporate or government ladder. How people treat their MBA journey is where differences lies, which is why if this journey will be treated like a person's way of travelling, this is how it will goes in my opinion.

1. Multiple cities in a very short period of time (1 city per day).

In this generation, traveling to various places will already elicit a lot of people should you opt to broadcast your experiences to them. So the more place you were able to go, the more people would be jealous at your accomplishments in a short period of time. However, traveling to multiple cities in a very short period of time could actually mean that even if you are a very busy person, you want to experience everything in a short period of time with probably low expenses, but probably a more tiring way.

This is a kind of a student who is speeding it up not only just to satisfy the corporate requirements of promotion or salary increase, but whose life roles are about to change or expand. Example of which are those who is set to get married. If one would still do the regular pacing, they would have a harder time to accomplish the things that they dreamed of which is why speeding it up would be a better option to them as they would not know when will they be able to finish them should they decide to stop. In addition, since one will be taking more subjects, this would mean that one will be saving a lot of miscellaneous expenses every term.

2. Single city in a usual period of time (e.g. 3-4 days per city).

In a multiple location/cities travel in a very brief period of time such as one country or city per day, it is true that you may get to experience various places, but it would actually not allow you to spend more time in the other places in the city than you would like to. If you would spend more days in a particular city, one would be able to appreciate it better despite the fact that you might want to spend the portion of the trip to some place else just to keep on accumulating travel experiences.

In graduate school, most likely this are the students who may be said to be on the right pace. In graduate school since students are also working, most of them would be taking only two subjects every term. Enough for them to still be balanced in terms of work, social life, etc. They will only comply what is required for them and would not take other options unless there is a change of plans that would affect their immediate goal.

3. Single city in more than the usual period of time

Visiting a city in a required period of time might only allow you to visit the key places in a city that are deemed attractive, but it might not allow you to further explore yourself in the other areas that might interest you. It may be a choice that would be frowned upon by majority, but it would still allow you to experience things slowly.

These students were the ones who are biding their time in school even if it would mean more miscellaneous fees to be paid upon. They are aware that they need it to be promoted or to be deemed successful, but they are not in a hurry in getting their diploma for as long as they think they would be able to learn more such as pursuing specialization. Their classmates may be waiting for their graduation march while these said students still haven't experienced the difficulty of taking up the more advanced subject or thesis, but they know that they were able to experience more than what their peers encountered. In addition, these people probably know, they'll reach there too, but for a longer period of time.

Learnings of "Pinoy Henyo" in Relation to Business and Life

Yesterday, our quiz in Information Management class is that each group will write six terms then one representative per group will be asked to guess three terms from the other group, that was randomly selected by the professor, in a span of six minutes. Each group will draw lots to determine the order of the groups in guessing the set of terms. The game is similar to "Pinoy Henyo" with the twist that the guesser will be blindfolded. The two groups to guess all three words/concepts the fastest will get a perfect score while the next two groups will get a score of 3.5 then the last two will get a score of 3.0. Here is my reflection of the activity we did.

1. You cannot be nice all the time.

One may be thinking that we should be nice to others hoping that they'll be nice to us also as what the Bible says. However in business world, that does not work most of the time. Competitors will and always will be taking advantage of everything. They'll even give you fits even if you are nice to them. In our case, we chose terms that are easy to remember or what we thought are important, but other groups would give you terms that are out of your hindsight. Fortunately, we weren't the ones who encountered the out of nowhere terms that we're asked to guess.

2. If you are going to throw fits, make sure you're ready to receive one.

This is probably why great businesses survive, when they throw difficult things to their supplier/customer, they ensure that they'll be able to protect themselves against possible threats that will be imposed to them and they have an immediate counter against these. In this case, the group who gave the most out of nowhere terms were the ones who guess the terms the fastest since they were able to prepare themselves if they were given a difficult one like what they did.

3. Be vigilant, be prepared.

Sometimes we had a tendency to be laid back on things that we thought we're assured of. In this case, our professor told us a week before that it is an open-notes exam. Probably most people are thinking that as long as you have all the notes, you're going to do fine. However, in the "Pinoy Henyo" it showed that it is not really an open notes for everybody. In fact the ones guessing the terms should actually have studied or know the terms for him/her to guess it correctly. In this case, one should still be prepared for the things even if we are guaranteed an assurance because sometimes there is a hidden clause in the contracts that we're agreeing with.

4. Be confident with your strengths.

People say that do not be overconfident with your strengths because it will backfire. This is true in some circumstances, but in a pressure situation, you have to depend on your strength especially if one of the ingredients to success of a game or project is one of your strengths. Personally I felt that the game is all about strategy, memory and luck. I know luck is not on our side that time since our groupmate had drawn to be the first group to guess. In addition, it seemed that he wasn't that confident enough for him to pull it off. I've been told by my mother and other former classmate of my ability to remember things. In addition, I read the slides prior to the class so I hesitantly told them that I'll do it since our group is quite hesitant to volunteer. It might have been a risky move as your group grade will mostly fall on your shoulders and it might sound a little brash for them, especially in a Filipino setting wherein you are not allowed to flaunt your strengths and if they compliment your strengths, you have to deny or thank them for noticing it. Fortunately, I was able to guess all the three terms before time expires.

5. Setting a trend without patent is a dangerous.

Being a first mover or the trend setter, you should be careful from threats from competitors and patent or copyright is really, really important especially in a competitive industry. If one failed to patent a product, it is easy to copy it because all they need to do is to use your product as a basis and improve it from there. Being a trendsetter, you encounter trial and error and if the competitors saw a strategy that worked in your company, they are going to do it with much more improvement. In addition, no matter how ridiculous your strategy or product is in the eyes of the competitors, they will always follow or improve it once you've proved to them that it worked even if it took you longer to accomplish it.

In our quiz, since I was the one guessing, I had a hard time getting hints from my groupmates since all I got is a "no", perhaps my lack of experience in this game is probably another factor. Instead of asking whether the term is a person, object thing especially when the terms are difficult to be categorized, I went with the strategy of stating the letters of the alphabet hoping that the first letter of the word would allow me to recall the terms easier. The strategy worked, but since I wasn't able to figure it out until the latter part of the game, I ate much time figuring things out. However, the basis of the grades is speed. Since other groups already saw how we fared and figured out our strategy worked, the succeeding groups was able to prepare themselves better and copy the strategy that you did, to the point of abusing it. In some groups, they are already asking the 2nd , 3rd or even up to the 5th letter of the word; thus guessing all the words at a faster pace. But then, in a quiz or game, you cannot request for patent since other groups can say that it was really in their mind, it happened that our group have to go first.

6. A proven strategy can make similar processes work no matter the difficulty.

Creating something is very difficult, revising it is easier. In businesses, once a structure is formed, it is easier to implement it in other areas especially when they are of the same process. It is similar to figuring out how to automate a particular data, then do it for the rest of the data available by improving it. In this game, even if the terms or concepts of the other groups are more difficult than ours, by figuring out the strategy, it is easier for them to guess the word at a faster time.

7. You cannot blame the leader or boss for all the company's flaw all the time.

In business, it is said the leader reflects the attitude of the organization. Yes the leader has a lot of responsibility on his/her shoulders, but it should be taken into consideration that the people around or the board chose a leader that they think could lead them. A leader cannot function if his/her subordinates are not listening, following or even have a dialogue with the leader on how to improve their company. In this game, the representative would act as a leader and the group's grade will depend on his/her ability to guess. The representative would not be able to guess the right word if the subordinates or the other members of the group would not participate in answering whether the representative is asking the right hints.

8. Communication is the key.

In a company, even if you have a good strategy in place, if the boss and employees are not articulating their thought to each other or are not communicating with each other clearly, it will be of no use. In our group, prior to the game itself, I told my groupmates about the use of "first half" and "second half" of the alphabet to determine the first letter of the word without blurting out the letters of the alphabet. However, when I mentioned that, they probably didn't understand what I'm saying. Perhaps they were thinking that it is the first half of the session or something else. This is why it is important that you've communicated well even if you are under pressure.

In the end, I might not able to get the highest possible grade for my groupmates, but looking their appreciation for what I did is already a great relief from me since I was able to give all my best in a most disadvantaged situation that was being thrown at us. In addition, I think that it's not only my good memory that enabled me to get it though, but also through my experiences as a leader in previous organizations such as quick thinking in finding an alternative to the solution, in this case a strategy of blurting out the letters of the alphabet since it is not restricted in the game. Also, learning from other groups is also important and if ever these kinds of games comes in again, I would be able to figure out on how to improve based on what I've saw and experienced. 

A Letter to the Local Government

As El Niño continues to strengthen in our country, we should be aware that global warming is indeed present not only in our country, but in the whole world. In our country global warming affects us in a way that summer seemed to be happening during mid March instead of the usual late March until early April. In addition, the top places locals visit during summer such as Baguio and Tagaytay does not become much enticing as the temperature is actually warmer compared before. Other effects of Global Warming would be that the soils in the farming is drying up easily, thus the drought in the country's crop which might lead with a shortage of food crops. If Global Warming cannot be prevented, plants, animals and even human could die for various diseases due to the heat stroke.

If we keep on taking for granted the gradual effects of global warming, we might end up suffering the effects and we hope that the damages will not be passed on to the future generations. So upon reading Dr. Nereus Acosta, presidential adviser for Environmental Protection, general manager of the Laguna Lake Development Authority, and the principal author of the Clean Air Act, here are some thoughts he ned that I think could also be applied in relation with our gradual experience of Global Warming.^[1]

1. There's No Economy Without Ecology

Since companies or governments aim for profit, we should put in mind that we should protect the foundation of all the profits that we have - the environment. Without the natural resources that the environment has given to us (e.g. land, air, water), there would be no profit in the first place for these corporations. It should be taken note that if we do not allocate or utilize our resources properly, little would we know that it would be harder for us to recover something that has been damaged already.

2. Metro Manila Is Fast Losing Its Green Areas

According to Acosta, there are only few green areas left such as the Arroceros Forest Park, Veterans Memorial Medical Center, etc. around Metro Manila. As the saying goes, the more trees that are being chopped off, the more carbon dioxide the plants can no longer be absorbed in the air and the lesser oxygen we could inhale. That is why it is said that living in the province is better as these green areas provide clean air for the residents in there, so converting these green areas in Metro Manila in exchange for more property would not be a good idea especially that the area of Metro Manila is already congested with traffic, which cause more pollution in the air. Wouldn't be nice if we get the coolness of an area because the trees protect us from shade and not exerting effort or putting an artificial air just for us to be comfortable?

3. Metro Manila is very vulnerable to natural calamities

By chopping off trees in exchange of building more properties, we are placing ourselves in danger. Because of the effects of Global Warming, we already experienced the consequence in Metro Manila such as Typhoon Ondoy and the Typhoon Pedring caused the sea walls of Manila Bay to crash. Shouldn't this be our wake-up call already that one of the most lauded areas in the Metro Manila cannot overcome the effects of these typhoons?

I know that our country still have hope for a change in a positive way, we can start treating the remaining green areas in the Metro Manila like an endangered place in which we should preserve what's remaining of it. Instead of planting trees outside the metro, it would be possible to do it in the metro even if almost all land are converted to concrete. There is still a way to somewhat improve the air condition of Metro Manila.

Even if it is a long shot, with the group effort and discipline of all the people involved, we can make a positive change for the community so that we can pass it on to the younger generations.

Footnote:

^[1] 6 Ecological Issues That Affect Real Estate of Metro Manila

Where is Justice?

Warning: This is the blogger's personal opinion based on her views and experiences, you've been warned that there might be some form of man-hating or very feminist approach in this page, especially the men of her race. 

We all scream for equality. Women are most likely to scream for equality, but we do know that some men are also screaming for one too, especially when a man seemed to be unattractive as they are usually associated with being a pervert even though they are not. So the question is what were the instances that both sexes experienced injustice in this world?

Society's Unequal Acceptance

Where is justice when it is okay for a man to cheat with somebody else yet for women it would automatically be associated with being a whore? I remembered when somebody argued that women are using the men's money to cheat that is why it is not acceptable in society. However even if the women use her own hard-earned money to cheat, it would be the same thing. In this situation, I remembered a story about how a woman would allow herself to cheat with a married man; and yet if she cheated with other men (thinking she is single and she is the other woman in their current situation anyway), the married man, whom the woman had relationship with, would call degrading names to a woman already.

Various reasons on why it's okay for men to cheat for some people, many thought that it's part of a man's gene to cheat. They say, men cannot help but to cheat, or it is only normal for them to do such thing as it is part of the man's nature and if they don't, they would deem as having gay tendencies. Another thing people say is that men are using their own hard-earned money to use it with other women they're cheating with; therefore, women have no rights to complain about it. However on the side of females, if they intend to do that, they would automatically be associated with being a whore or prostitute, while for men such association doesn't exist - in fact it is an ego booster for them to be associated in one indicating that they have strong masculine tendencies as they had a strong sense of magnetizing attractive women by their side. Even during biblical times wherein women are treated as second class, these men can even have two wives during those times while a woman committing the same sin will be stoned to death. Where is justice?

Masculinity Issues

Where is justice when a woman can't get satisfied no matter how hard the man labored just to give something for a woman he loves? Traditionally, men are expected to be gentlemen, they are expected to pay when they are going to a date with a woman. There are some women who are considerate in terms of knowing that they should not spend lavishly on something, while other women are mostly being thought as gold diggers, which unfortunately is true in some cases.

If a woman's confidence would grow based on the number of her admirers, a man's confidence would grow based on his ability to show off his masculinity such as ability to pay for dinner, etc. The issue in today's world is that because of a closer gap in inequality between men and women, both men and women have an equal pay especially when both have the same level of competence in their respective fields. Before, men have higher pay compared with women; therefore it is only proper for a man to treat the women in dates since the woman would generally end up being a housewife. However, today there are cases wherein men even got a lower pay than women. 

So how would women respond to this issue if they have higher income? It seemed like women need to balance the ego tendencies of men in order to really not look bad in a situation. A traditionalist/gold-digging mentality woman would not consider the man's financial resources for as long as she is being satisfied would not only hurt the man financially, but also his ego if he keep on failing to satisfy the woman's desires, especially when it comes to giving her gifts. This kind of woman would even act like a brat if she does not get what she wants. However, a strong independent woman would insist on splitting the bill as it would mean that they are not gold diggers in the eyes of men, but doing that would hurt the ego of men and these men would think that this woman is inconsiderate of a man's masculinity. 

If a man treated a woman in a cheap restaurant or insist that they split the bill, he is deemed to be cheap. If a man would treat a woman lavishly, he's being viewed as someone who will use his money to buy love for a woman especially when the man is unattractive to women. Where is justice?

Conditional Love and Prestige

Where is justice wherein unconditional love between lovers only exist on one side or none at all? Sadly, most of us live in a world wherein everything revolves on a conditional love. In movies and series, main characters with large socio-economic gap would be deemed as loving each other unconditionally that made people think that such love exist. If the story in the movies/series was mimicked in the real world, would we still have the same ending? Yes, it's still possible but common sense would tell majority of the people that it's not. When a man is attracted to a woman with a much lower income class, even if he is not attractive, common sense would tell the woman to accept the man even if he's ugly because that would be the only way for her family to level up their social status, to get out of poverty. So do we think that the man here would marry the woman because he loves her even if she's poor? It's true that the man is richer so we can say that this man is loving her unconditionally; however, usually women are attractive and men had a tendency to use women as a form of trophy wife or a means to show-off these women to their friends. It's a matter of each one benefiting the other by deciding to be together even if they really do not love each other - unconditionally.

We already heard numerous stories before, specially in rural areas wherein young women are forced to marry rich old men because of economic hardships. Aside from economic issues, there is also prestige issues. Traditions, especially of Chinese ones put a high value of prestige in which marrying someone not of your race would indicate a lost of social prestige and purity of Chinese blood for your children. The pressure is big especially for men as they are the ones who will be carrying the name of their family and a purity of Chinese bloodline must be ensured. Before, things like arranged marriage exist, but even if couples do not really love each other, such infidelity does not exist. 

Sadly in today's world, some Chinese men would only marry a Chinese girl for the sake of preserving the bloodline and not because they unconditionally love them. In addition, I would admit that even though the beauty of each on of us is unique, the physical beauty of a Filipina is really incomparable that of a Chinese; therefore it is not really surprising if these Chinese men have two women in their lives. One is the one they really love, but cannot marry because of parents' disapproval of race difference and only being brought to events among his friends only as a means of showing off on how beautiful she is; and the other is a girl of his same race that is only being show off in terms of family and prestigious social gathering wherein he is showing the world that he is a good man who married someone of his own race and able to preserve the family's pure bloodline. It also proves the man that he belonged in a prestigious class, while still being able to show off the other girl with his friends for ego boosting. 

In this situation, both women deserve more than what they were experiencing. The Chinese girl deserve someone who would accept her for who she is and not just a mere cover-up for the man's family gatherings because she's Chinese. The Filipina girl, or any girl who is not Chinese also deserves more, she should not blame herself for not being Chinese that's why she cannot be with the man she loves. If the man truly loves her, he will choose her no matter what even if it would mean a loss of inheritance from his parents or his prestigious and social life. Besides, we cannot convince all elders to accept inter-racial marriage as a new norm and if one's family are open-minded then they are lucky to have those kinds of people around them. As the idiomatic expression goes, you can't have your cake and eat it too. However, it seemed these Chinese men have best of both worlds by having at least two women by their side and they can use each one like their chess pieces or as part of their wardrobe wherein they would bring the woman that they think will boost their ego and confidence as a man. Where is justice?

What Can We Do About It?

Both sexes are striving for equality. We had a tendency to hold on to something that would deem advantageous to us. For men, knowing that woman can get permitted to cheat would lose their ego and masculinity as having numerous women would mean that they can no longer guarantee themselves that the women they are cheating with are also not cheating on them too. In addition, knowing that a woman can cheat with men would also make the man more insecure as he can be deemed not man enough for the woman that's why the woman cheated. 

As for women, requiring them to split the bill would mean that they cannot use the money to spend for buying things that would make their image better such as clothing, jewelry, etc. In addition, requiring them to do things on their own without the help of the men would mean that women should not act like brats or princesses just to get something that they want.

This is difficult as both men and women have different framework and approach when it comes to gender equality. I think in order to ensure equality, there should be a communication between two opposing sexes and have a mutual understanding on what is right and wrong especially for a man wherein they are permitted to commit cheating in the eyes of public. It cannot be avoided that there will be some kind of condition when it comes to choosing a mate, however by choosing to be faithful to your partner and treat each other with respect, there would be no qualms for society rallying violence, abuse, and inequality.